Deep deep down

Good morning, world.

Well, I asked for it. Here I am face to face with myself, and my creativity. Now the real work begins. Could this be why I am feeling all this incredible sadness coming up?  All of this pain?  Am I sure I want this?  How to get rid of it? Put it in a painting!! Express it! Write it! Get it out! Throw it into a chicken like the witch doctor does! Poor chicken...

This is exactly what Julia Elmore expressed on the beginning of her challenge. Wanted to express JOY and ended up expressing SADNESS.  I guess that's the door you have to go through.

Last night I went to my painting class and couldn't get the strength or desire up to get in there, I just sat in the car feeling this huge ball of pain in my chest, but WHY? I should be jumping for joy! I now have everything I've always wanted!

I wanted the space to be me, the space and time to create, and now I have it.  Facing that white page, I feel terrified.

Perhaps also the fact that the 30 day challenge is over, and I'm left on my own?

This scary place, Julia Cameron talks about it. So does Connie.  It's normal. IT'S NORMAL!!! THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH ME !  It's part of the process. So dig in!! Get to it! Au boulot!